Author Archives: Flobilius

Bryce Harper, Unwitting Subject of Article

The desert sun growing up wasn’t good on Bryce’s skin.

We forgive children when they make mistakes.  I will never forgive Mark Judge for writing “Bryce Harper, Conservative Hero” on the opinion page of the Daily Caller.

Remember the first truly horrible thing to happen to you?  That moment when your bubble of childhood innocence was shattered by the realization that your cousin Bart’s devotion to eating a gallon of Haagen Dasz a day was directly responsible for his premature death in the second grade?

Even if you never had a cousin who learned to roll because he could never learn to walk, you probably had such a moment—an inflection point in your life after which everything around you was just a little bit worse.  And remember what you were told? “That’s life. . .bad things happen.”

What you weren’t told, however, is that sometimes bad things are written down.  And sometimes, no one stops them from being printed.  And sometimes, you read them.

It’s times like this that I wish I could trade places with Bart.  Or at least banish Mark Judge’s “Bryce Harper, Conservative Hero” article into the kiddie pool we buried him in.

Well, let’s get to it.

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