Atlanta Braves Kidnap Chad Durbin

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You can see the fear in his eyes.

The Atlanta Braves announced today that they had signed Chad Durbin, meaning that Ryan Mattheus will likely get the final Nationals spot in the bullpen. While the bullpen controversy has been solved, another one has emerged. The Atlanta Braves and Frank Wren have committed a horrific and illegal act and kidnapped Chad Durbin.

The Nationals have yet to announce Durbin’s release from the team, meaning that he was most likely taken by Chipper Jones in the night. If you see Durbin wearing a Braves uniform and looking happy, it’s probable that he is experiencing Stockholm Syndrome. Please save him and return him to the Nationals.

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