Chad Tracy Signs One-Year Extension

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To celebrate, Jayson Werth attempted to gore Chad.

Chad Tracy has signed an extension. This upsets the owners of the home with said extension, who didn’t want an autograph and were wondering why he was in their back yard in the first place.

Johnson made the announcement before Friday’s game. Many reporters just grouped it with the many other senile statements that Davey regularly makes, such as “I once was a yodeler,” and, “My feet are urchins.” Luckily, Mike Rizzo burst in to the room in time to tell reporters that the signing was indeed true.

Tracy has been a valuable bat off the bench for the Nationals, with an .870 OPS through 68 PA this season. I’m sure the media and fans will pressure him to reproduce these numbers next season considering the surely monstrous deal he signed (no terms were announced). Let’s hope Chad Tracy can deal with the pressure, and come out shining like a diamond, on the diamond, with a diamond. What I’m saying is, I’m proposing to Chad Tracy with this lovely engagement ring I have. I’m sure he’ll accept.

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