Category Archives: Holidays

North Side Team Sends Nats Emotions South: Perfect Season Over

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Ryan Zimmerman let out a real bad fart.
(AP Photo/Nam Y. Huh)

Final Score: Cubs 4, Nationals 3.

Dame of the Game:

Jordan Zimmermann: 7 IP, 6 H, 0 BB, 1 ER, 4 K, only 80 pitches. Zimmerman turned in a tremendous performance on the mound but suffered the loss, as the Cubs ended up finding more eggs in the day’s Easter egg hunt.

Shame of the Game:

Ryan Mattheus: 0.1 IP, 1 H, 2 BB, 2 ER. Mattheus’ runs allowed made the ultimate difference in the game. No that’s not Easter chocolate all over. It’s Mattheus, shitting all over the game.

Easter is all about resurrection, yet the Nats failed to come back from the dead (the dead, defined as a 4-1 deficit) and win today’s game. One can argue that this was because Jesus (Flores) never pinch hit, but really the Nationals seemed overmatched the whole game. Their perfect season has come to an end. Maybe the team had given up losing for Lent and was just finally giving in to their urges after a long wait. I hope not.

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The 10 Plagues of Natstown

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More commonly known as baseball's Moses.

For far too long the Nationals have been abused, mistreated and overpowered as if they were slaves to the rest of the NL East. This blog is fed up, and wants you all to join with us in demanding what the Nationals truly deserve. Freedom. …To win the NL East. …or at least one of the two wild card spots.

We will no longer be subservient. We will rise up and fight for what we want. If the NL East dares to get in the way, then they can expect the following 10 plagues.

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