Tag Archives: Andrew McCutchen

Nats Sign Two to Minor League Deals

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And one of them likes to play golf. I hope he doesn’t blow late season games just to get out on the course.

While the following moves happened a few days ago, they are still worth noting. Especially since nothing else is happening for the Nationals aside from Adam LaRoche saying he wants 3 years, Mike Rizzo saying he won’t budge from two years, and that process repeating again and again. It’s like some terrible sitcom that has an overdone, recycled plot for many of its episodes and ends up going nowhere. Well hopefully the LaRoche saga, as well as How I Met Your Mother, will both be over soon.

The Nationals have signed Mike Costanzo and Matt Torra to minor league deals. Costanzo immediately brings to mind George Costanza. They clearly have the same unfortunate luck, as Costanzo spent some time with the Phillies in his career. He had a cup of coffee in the majors, only it was bitter and instead of cream contained many tears. Costanzo had 21 plate appearances for the Reds and did not produce much. But hopefully, with some semi-decent career minor league numbers, Costanzo can do something for this organization that isn’t just sparking ideas for new Seinfeld jokes.

Matt Torra was part of the impressive draft class of Justin Upton, Alex Gordon, Ryan Braun, Ricky Romero, Troy Tulowitzki, Andrew McCutchen, Jay Bruce, and our own Ryan Zimmerman. Sadly, he was none of those people. Having been drafted 31st overall in 2005, Torra’s career has been less than stellar to this point. But while his stats may not be that good, we’re stuck with him now. No, releasing is not an option for Torra. Why you ask? Well if we dropped the Torra, we’d have to fast for 40 days. And Ben’s Chili Bowl is far too delicious to do that.

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This is the Pitts: Pirates Buc the Trend of Losing A Lot

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Bryce Harper finds it to be an unfortunate time for the laxatives to kick in. (AP Photo/Haraz N. Ghanbari)

Final Score: Pirates 5, Nationals 3.

Dame of the Game:

Andrew McCutchen: 2-4, 2 R, 2 HR, 2 RBI. Now I know what you’re saying. Why give the dame of the game award to a Pirate. Why give it to a non-National for the first time ever. Well… THE NATIONALS WERE AWFUL AND IF YOU TRY TO DEFEND THEIR EFFORT, YOU ARE A WRONG PERSON.

Shame of the Game: 

Jordan Zimmermann: 6 IP, 7 H, 4 ER, 1 BB, 6 K. 6 IP and 4 ER won’t help the Nationals get a win, Zim. Come on, do something like pitch 7 innings and allow one run. That’ll surely get a lot of wins. …wait.

There were a couple odd things about today’s game. Adam LaRoche tripled. Jesus Flores was the most prolific bat in the lineup. But the oddest thing of all was the Pirates winning. And with that win, the Pirates managed to take the season series from the Nationals 3-2. So even if the Nats make it all the way to becoming World Series champions, even if the Nats have the greatest season in the franchise’s history, Neal Huntington will be able to call Mike Rizzo late at night and laugh and laugh and laugh. And this time for a reason that wasn’t after Neal caught a glimpse of Rizzo’s underwhelming features in a bathroom at the GM meetings.

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“The Shark” Makes it Big, What Will Be Next?

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Roger Bernadina murdering Andrew McCutchen.
(Credit: Sharkadina)

Despite our efforts to suggest a more fearsome nickname for Roger Bernadina, it seems as if “The Shark” has stuck. Even longtime hater Bill Ladson finally admitted that Bernadina’s nickname was “The Shark.” During last night’s game, “Shark” chants filled the stadium. It was arguably the most joyous occasion where hundreds of people were screaming “Shark.” Depends if you like seeing fellow beach-goers being mauled.

This got us thinking. If a couple of other fans nicknamed Bernadina, why couldn’t this blog succeed in doing the same for other Nationals. Below, may I recommend some nicknames for all those in Natstown to consider. Additionally I recommend a certain item to wear for each nickname, much like Sharkadina fans wearing shark heads.

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