Tag Archives: Andruw Jones

DR DR, Give Me The News: Dominicans Have Bad Case of Going Undefeated, Loving You

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Sadly in modern baseball, scolding the opposing team no longer counts for 2 runs.

Final Score: Dominican Republic 4, Netherlands 1.

World Baseball Conflict of the Game: This family from the Netherlands trying to adjust to life in the Dominican Republic.

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Well one thing is clear for sure. Not being much does not exclude you from winning, unless of course we’re talking about a mass possession contest. In that case if you are not much, not only are you not Dutch, but you also are a failure. Despite being much and Dutch, the Dutch proved to be not much in terms of winning. Much of the fanfare about the Dutch abruptly died, as the not-so-much-Dutch Dominicans proved to be much much more than the Dutch, despite the amount of their muchness coming into question often, given their lack of Dutch-ness. Well all that ado about muchness turned out to be much ado about nothing. It is odd that something about muchness could ultimately amount to nothing, but it is the case here. The Dutch were much-Dutch, but not much of a baseball team. And for that, they lost.

But you know who are much and Dutch, much in that there are 5 of them and Dutch in that they are from the Netherlands? The Broekhuijsen family. The Broekhuijsens were a family of ex-pats who moved to the Dominican Republic in 2001. Arriving in an unfamiliar land, and lacking the support and comfort they were used to at home, was tough for this group of Dutch folks. Just like it must have been tough for the Netherlands baseball team. They were thousands of miles from home, and fitting in was hard. Whether it was because they were an unappreciated baseball squad, or because they were white, blending in well with these foreign worlds was going to be a challenge.

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Double Dutch: Netherlands Leap Over Cuba For Second Time

An increasingly tubby Andruw Jones goes out for a morning stroll.

An increasingly tubby Andruw Jones goes out for a morning stroll.

Final Score: Netherlands 7, Cuba 6

World Baseball Conflict of the Game: The Dutch role in preventing the Cuban Missile Crisis

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This, ladmen and gentleladies, is why the World Baseball Classic is wonderful. A baseball powerhouse against a baseball upstart; the New World against the Old and the Old Baseball World against the New. Someone named Kalian Sams hitting a walk-off sac fly.

If you have been an assiduous follower of The Zimmerman(n) Telegram’s WBC coverage (FOR SHAME if you have not), you’ll clearly remember my comrade’s coverage of the last CUB-NED game, which was an obvious metaphor for Dutch adventures in 17th century Spanish Cuba. For this post, the foreign power the Dutch are dealing with in Cuba will be not the Spanish, but the Soviet Union. We’re later in the World Baseball Classic, so the metaphor is later in time. Obviously. Continue reading

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Amster-Damming Loss: Dutch Ain’t Much More Than a Bunch of Phonies Vs. Japan

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The outfield wall in the Tokyo Dome could really use some restoration.

Final Score: Japan 16, Netherlands 4.

World Baseball Conflict of the Game: Japanese enslavement of the Dutch people during World War II.

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Japan went through a rough patch during World War II, in terms of having their people sent to POW and internment camps, and whatnot. But in the grand scheme of it all, the universe always seems to even things out. And what better way to say I’m sorry to Japan for having your people enslaved, than for the universe to give them the chance to enslave groups of people as well.

While the Koreans were enslaved in the millions, they were embarrassed early on in the World Baseball Classic so lets ignore that horrible human rights violation. Instead, lets look at the much smaller case of how Japan enslaved settlers in the Dutch colony of Indonesia. Only 40,000 Dutch settlers were captured as opposed to the many more Koreans, which is ironic considering the phrase “If you ain’t Dutch, you ain’t much.”

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Nether’s Region: Dutch Prove Pool B Favorite South Korea Ain’t Much

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The Netherlands have assembled an impressive 25-man team.

Final Score: Netherlands 5, South Korea 0.

World Baseball Conflict of the Game: The Korean War.

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The Dutch had dealt with the Koreans before. They knew just how difficult a fight they were in for going into this WBC game. Having lost 120 men in the Korean War, although an insignificant number compared to what other countries lost, the Netherlands were intent on avenging this deaths and proving their dominance over the Koreans.

However all these feelings were kind of silly to have. For you see, given the accepted culture of the Netherlands, all the players on the team were actually very high and had a great deal of trouble realizing the difference between North and South Korea.

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