Tag Archives: Collin Balester

Nats Sign Caleb Clay


Collin Balester has been completely replaced.

Continuing their thrilling offseason, one that rivals the Blue Jays’ in terms of excitement, the Nats have signed Caleb Clay to a minor league deal. Clay is one of the only players in MLB history to be a compensatory pick for a team losing Bill Mueller. What an honor, perhaps even a Hall of Fame worthy accolade.

Clay has been in the Red Sox’s system since 2007, posting decent but uninspiring career numbers. Hopefully our organization can mold him into more of a star.

Get it? Cause he’s clay. Clay molds? No? Ok.

Since he’s still young and depending on how he develops, this signing could be a bargain. I hope all this money going Clay’s way though doesn’t make him feel overprivileged and lead to a life of laziness. Money can corrupt people, I just hope it doesn’t corrupt this potential bargain.

Get it? Cause he’s clay. Henry Clay? Corrupt Bargain? No? Ok.

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Mike Gonzalez Called Up, Phone Bill Slightly Increases


Gonzalez finds the inside of his hat to be amazingly interesting.

The Nationals called up Mike Gonzalez today, adding a once tremendous, twice mediocre, and thrice much too grabby player to their bullpen. Gonzalez will provide another lefty arm, leading the rest of the Nats to be more careless knowing that if their left arms are amputated they have a new backup.

Ryan Perry was sent down to make room for Gonzalez, leading Collin Balester fans to say “See, I told you we shouldn’t have done that trade!” Ok Balester family, please be quiet, the rest of us don’t really care.

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Twenty-Eighth Spring Training Game: Washington Nationals (SS(X Tricky)) vs. Detroit Tiggers are Wonderful Things


The Nationals got lucky that they only have to see Balester's fearsome face in Spring Training.

You know what they say. Two heads are better than one. They also say 40 some odd heads are better than 25, as the two Nationals split squads made a clean sweep of the day. After beating the Braves earlier, the Nationals split squads continued to shine, beating the Tigers in the night game by a score 5-3. The Nationals have really turned it on late in Spring Training, which is good because honestly if they’re not turning things on it’s hard for me to stay into it the whole time. I mean after a while it becomes humping for no real reason.

The Nationals only made one offensive substitution the whole game, having catcher Sandy Leon replace Jesus Flores late. Flores was a little upset to be taken out of the game while all his teammates stayed in. Lets hope everything stays ok in the clubhouse, because Jesus does not like to be crossed.


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2012 Nationals Player Profile: Ryan Perry


Ryan Perry (left), taking the Miguel Cabrera approach to becoming a star.

The Washington Nationals traded for the Tigers’ one time star prospect and middle reliever Ryan Perry this offseason. To commemorate his first season as a National, I wrote a poem:

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