Tag Archives: Jake Peavy

Split Peavy Soup: Nats Slurp Up White Sox in Series Opener

When the sunlight reflects off this sign at just the right angle, you can make out the faint hidden hologram message: “Suck it, Phillies.”

Final Score: Nationals 8, White Sox 7.

Belle of the Ball: Adam LaRoche. Adam’s two home runs made me forgive his 0-14 start to the season, but will I ever forget? Yeah, probably, in a couple months.

Smell of the Ball: Rafael Soriano. Save or no, Soriano smelled like a toilet that had gone unflushed flushed for a thousand years.

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Man, I love Gio Gonzalez. Can’t get enough of him. I go to all his starts. I love when he pitches, when he hits, when he just sits in the dugout and grins, when he balks with the bases loaded–wait. No. I hate when he does that. Damn it, Gio.

But even in the face of such a balk, I will not balk (HA) at expressing my affection for Gio, especially when he follows it up with four scoreless innings. Continue reading

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Jason Hammel Chosen As Harper’s Running Mate

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All-Star caliber pitcher AND interpretive dancer.

The Nationals have found a running mate for Bryce Harper. Washington has partnered with the longtime “rival” Orioles to bring out the voters in greater numbers to support a Bryce Harper/Jason Hammel final vote ticket. Excellent strategy by the Nationals to pick a man from a team that can get the Nats some votes from outside their sphere of influence. Just like on a Presidential ticket, the Nationals played it smart and picked someone from somewhere far far away. That’s right, look for Harper to not only get votes from a 30 mile range around DC, but also from a 40 mile range around DC!

Hammel also balances out the ticket in other ways, including being a pitcher and not having any long-term potential to be good.

What’s really notable about this union between one-time rivals is that we on this blog predicted it back at the beginning of April. We are clearly of a great level of intelligence and should be hired by all teams to suggest alliances for the sake of the All-Star Game Final Vote. White Sox and Cardinals, what about a Peavy/Freese ticket? It almost sounds like “Pee Wee Reese,” if you’re inebriated enough.

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