Tag Archives: Todd Coffey

Dodgers Decline Todd Coffey’s Option

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I can’t wait til we maybe see Coffey (barely) fit into one of our jerseys again.

As a devastating force hits the Northeast, another even more unstoppable force hits free agency. Todd Coffey is officially a free agent after the Dodgers declined his $2.5 million option earlier today. Some would call it an easy move, considering Coffey underwent Tommy John and will be out until after the All-Star Break. But these people are foolish.

Too many people rely on new fangled statistics to determine a player’s worth. Like WAR, and FIP, and games played. But I really value a player by how much heart he has. And Todd Coffey has the most heart in the majors. Sure he might just sit on our bench, tweeting pro-Romney things and then claiming it was a friend’s kid as we wait for him to actually pitch in a game. But his presence alone will propel this team towards victory. Or into a constant orbit around him. One of those two things.

I hope the Nationals make the right choice and bring back Todd Coffey. We miss you, Todd.

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The Kemperor’s New Clothes: Clippard Can’t See Dodger Uniforms After Surrendering Home Run

When Zimmerman returned the ball to Lannan, it read, simply, “I wish you were someone else.”

Final Scores: Nationals 3, Dodgers 1; Dodgers 7, Nationals 6.

Dame of the Games: Jordan Zimmermann: 6 IP, 1 ER, 6 H, 2 BB, 4 K. After a number of bad starts recently, Jordan was back to his old tricks. And I don’t mean that trick he used to play on his mother where he would fake his own death. That was mean.

Shame of the Games: John Lannan. 3.2 IP, 6 ER, 8 H, 2 BB, 3 K.. It’s not John Lannan’s fault that he’s such a bad pitcher, really. He, like most people on this earth, is destined to an existence of never truly excelling in his field of choice. Can we really fault him for simply performing at the same level most of us do?

Yes. Hypocrisy’s never stopped me before.

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Every time I hear the word “doubleheader,” naturally the first thing I think of is two baseball games in the same day. But the second thing I think of is some kind of creature that has two heads. Any such creature could, of course, be described as a double-header.

Double-headers can be good, bad, or neutral. My feelings about yesterday’s doubleheader between the Nats and the Dodgers can thus be chronicled in terms of pictures of creatures with two heads that I deem either good, bad, or neutral. Makes sense, right?

For instance. Yesterday’s doubleheader was a single admission doubleheader (I picture a double-headed creature who has only ever admitted guilt to a single horrible crime in his life), so my ticket to the nightcap could have gotten me into both games. But due to Other Commitments, I only arrived at Nats Park after the first game had ended. At that point, the doubleheader was going quite well. The Nats had won the first game 3-1. It looked something like this:

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Eleventh Spring Training Game: Washington Nationals vs. St. Louis Cardinal Sins

Drew Storen, failing to protect himself both from the rain and his own anguish at Todd Coffey's absence

Today’s game was washed away in a torrent of Todd Coffey’s tears of homesickness for the Nationals. The abject misery of everyone at Roger Dean Stadium could not even be assuaged by another excellent outing from Gio Gonzalez. The game will be replayed once the pain starts to heal.

It may never be replayed.

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