Tag Archives: Trent Jewett

Nationals Ring the Bell, Win at Pitt: A Pirates Series Recap

Game 1:

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Jason Grilli’s hair starts spinning to prepare for takeoff. (AP Photo/Keith Srakocic)

Pirates 3, Nationals 1

“Fuck the Yankees.”

Having admitted to being, in addition to a Nationals fan, a Yankees fan, that is not a sentence I have said often. I said something like it once before when I asked my girlfriend to keep putting on different masks of Yankees players so I could live out a totally non-gay, non-weird fantasy. But don’t judge, cause you’d do it too if you got to imagine you were having sex with Bartolo Colon.

But it has recently become clear that the Yankees, obviously tired of winning the World Series (why else would they trade for Vernon Wells and sign Lyle Overbay?), have made it their sole objective to hurt the Nationals. The plan? It’s obvious. To acquire terrible talent and strategically send them off to teams where they could hurt the Nationals most. You may say I’m a conspiracy theorist, but I have proof that the government doesn’t want me to reveal because Bigfoot is real and 9/11 was an inside job.

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Nats Hire Tony Tarasco as 1B Coach, Promote Trent Jewett to 3B

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I hope he doesn’t get mad everytime the first baseman snags the ball before he’s able to.

Per Bill Ladson, the Nationals have hired former major leaguer Tony Tarasco to coach first base next season. How could the Nationals be so foolish. In our war against the Phillies, why are we bringing in the relative of one of them?

That’s right. Tony Tarasco is the cousin of…Jimmy Rollins.

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2012 Washington Nationals Roster

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The new style for team photos has made some of the players uncomfortable.

Spring is over. The battle to be one of the last 25 standing has come to a close. While some argue that certain people didn’t deserve to make the team, and others say that some players were snubbed, the one thing I think we can all agree on is that twenty-five players have been selected.

Let’s look at the team:

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